Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
i may or may not be watching the land before time
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
