You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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