we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
