; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I think your dad took our porno
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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