yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
