Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize
