Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
