I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize