Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
