I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
