Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Randomize