how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
