He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
PANTIES FOUND
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
