it wasn't lemon gatorade
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
The air was thick with penises
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The struggles of a small town man whore
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
