I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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