I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
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