there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
