I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
