Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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