The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
stop calling my apartment porn island.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
