Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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