if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Pooping to opera.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize