everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
