I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
