i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
