So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Randomize
