Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
worst night to have a conscience
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
