He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize