i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
