Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
