Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
