recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
