she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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