don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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