You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
