Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Randomize