How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
