Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
