She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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