Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
