i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
NoShamevember. You game?
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize