Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
