Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
