You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
