i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
