hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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