i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Randomize
