Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Randomize
