Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
