I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
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