I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize