bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
